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I miss the
immediacy
of booze

the punch
in the gut

the smack
to the back
of the head

the loosing
of muscles
and tendons

and tongue

and thought

not this
surreptitious
pissing around

of bitter pills
prescribed
to stabilize

to sneakily
soothe
raw nerves

and calm
the madman

slowly

grind down
his jagged
edges

when he’s
not looking

to make him
much easier
to swallow

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